You know the saying, “That changed my life.”
Only once in my life was I ever able to say it, the day Jesus came into my heart to live.
Until Joe’s cancer.
That changed my life too… mainly in the area of battling thoughts.
I now have days I am assaulted with fears. I realize my life could change in a day with some unforeseen tragedy. I had thought my life was pretty much under control… but that was before.
I’m having to face God with the real “faith” I have, or don’t have. It has been humbling. But I can cast myself on His abundant grace while I am trying to set my feet on solid ground. His grace is my safe place right now.
I had thought my faith was about trusting Him to answer my prayers, hear my worries and help me be a “good” Christian. Now…
I’m hearing Him say He wants my friendship. He wants to tell me how He is thinking and feeling about stuff.
I think of what was said of Moses in Exodus 33:11, “The LORD used to speak to Moses face to face, just as a man speaks to his friend.” Do I want that type of friendship? I realize it won’t be all about me.
It will mean more listening. It will be His voice I long for — His presence.
There might be long bouts of silence, where He is just with me, with no entertainment, or big mission to accomplish. He might share with me His heart and His perspective on suffering… which makes me wait for His timing to rescue, because He has a bigger plan.
Prayer changes for me… It comes from His point of view, and I know He hears me because He is sharing His heart and I am asking the things that delight Him.
This has changed my life… I have a Friend I’m learning to know and love, because He has loved me first and has chosen me to be His friend.
John 15.13-16: “Greater love has no one than this that one lay down his life for his friends. You are my friends if you do what I command you. No longer do I call you slaves, for the slave does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all things that I have heard from My Father I have made known to you. You did not choose me but I chose you, and appointed you that you would go and bear fruit, and that your fruit would remain, so that whatever you ask of the Father in My name He may give to you.”
