When you don’t understand God’s mind – trust His heart

People are right to say, “When you don’t understand God’s mind – trust His heart.” I learned this in 2003 when my oncologist stamped an expiration date on my life, proclaiming I had “days to live.” I was shocked and angry my battle with cancer had come to this. Oh, and I was very confused.

• God, what are you thinking?
• Are you seriously just going to let me die?
• At 44, I’m just getting rolling as a Pastor, why bench me now?

After some intense wrestling, God established me in a powerful concept to navigate fog. I later discovered a Hebrew word for it, “dayenu,” which means, “It would have been enough.” The term is used in a Passover song recounting miracles God performed during Israel’s exodus from Egypt. God freed them from slavery, parted the Red Sea, provided manna in the desert, and more. The song declares if God had only done one miracle, it would have been enough!

So to me, the greatest dayenu is God giving His Son Jesus to die on the cross to take away my sin for all eternity! Though he has done so much more, this concrete demonstration of His amazing love is forever enough! When I do not understand His mind, I trust His heart!

In those dark nights of my soul, I released my desperate grip on my life to God. It was so freeing to be able to say with Paul, “To live is Christ and to die is gain” (Philippians 1:21).

Later, I realized why I went through the cancer trial, to experience Him deeper to help folks walk through their battles through Stronghold Ministry. Yet I may not understand some things about my life until He explains them in heaven. Still, I can always fall back on His good intent toward me at the cross, which brings peace when I don’t get it. No wonder God tells us in Proverbs 3:5:

“Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding.”

Is His love demonstrated for you on the cross enough? Find out how to receive Jesus’ free gift of eternal life?